Arrrgghh, what did I do wrong? I hate to admit it, but I was trying to put the batteries in the wrong part of the charger...very difficult to describe in words. In the charging channel, you have a connector at one end and an expandable, spring-controlled second connector, and between the second connector and the second end, you've got an empty space. I tried putting the batteries in the empty space, and obviously the spring connector wouldn't stay put and there were no connectors, and the spring end kept springing back up...

It was really a I-need-a-new-brain" moment when I realized that OF COURSE I was doing it wrong. And the stupid, dumb, really knuckle-brained thing was that I had just finined correctly charging a pair of 18650s. So like, what was I thinking????9l'f4=\
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