Most people are a pain in the arse which is why I have fewer people I would call a friend than those who call me one... So having family can be even more difficult when you don't have the choice of who you surround yourself with.
If someone is staying with you then as early as possible, lay down some ground rules and consequences, otherwise they will just get used to getting away with whatever they have been and think they are untouchable. It's your place, not theirs and you're doing them the favour. If they can't learn then it shouldn't be your problem, so get rid.
There is a big difference between family duty and moral duty. If other family are telling you it's your responsibility etc then tell them maybe they should try putting up with 'the other' for a while and see how they feel after a few months because presumably there's a reason they're staying with you in the first place.
Skeeeets wrote:
Anyone here loose a sibling? That's another issue on the list...
My sincere condolences. Lost my twin and only sibling when we were 12.
It's difficult to explain the vacuum that leaves behind. Even more difficult to see what it does to parents.
Hate those platitudes about 'time heals all' etc. Well meaning as it is, it's usually said by people who haven't been through it.
It doesn't stop hurting but it does dull with time. Anniversaries, Christmas, birthdays, shared music and interests are always tainted because or what they remind you of, there's no changing that.
If it's too heavy then keep yourself occupied and busy with things you love, don't feel guilty about trying to find something to make you happy because people who really love you wouldn't want you to be miserable.
Change your scenery until it's less of a foreground, more of a background but at some point you have to reconcile things in your head and find a way to get closure if you are to move on. It does take a long time and small consolation for how it feels now, it does get easier in the future.
The pain felt is directly proportional to the amount of love you had in your heart. Some things can leave a very big hole there. Try not to fill that hole with stuff which is toxic.
Edited on 10/18/2020 at 4:45 PM. Reason: